ZAIDY - A VERY DEAR FRIEND

Moving to Canada almost 20 years ago was a major step for me. I was already close to being 50 and knew that it was going to be a major wrench for me to pull away from my family, a family that I loved and still do, love so dearly.

It’s a dilemma that we are all going to face at one time or another. Grabbing a life changing opportunity or letting it pass by and living a life of regret. My decision to grasp it was an easy one as my children were well into adulthood and had children of their own and on top of that my mother had always taught me to grab whatever came your way and not to live a life of regret – a principle that I live by today and have passed onto my children – all of them! For those of you who have ever had to make that leap of faith from one continent to another will understand the challenges – new currency, new culture, new friends, in fact new everything. Challenging yet exciting.

During my first few months I met many great people and made many, many friends (Canadians are such a nice bunch of people), but of all those friendships one stands out more than most and has truly stood the test of time. These friends are a middle aged Jewish couple, 15/20 years my senior who immediately took me and my new wife, (yes I remarried in Canada) into their hearts and their home introducing us to their entire family. Certainly a joy to behold.

When we gave birth to our two beautiful girls it was always difficult to find babysitters, but even more challenging was that our two girls didn’t have a Grandma or Grandad whom they could visit and share their little secrets with as all grandchildren love to do. But Buby and Zaidy (the Jewish name for Grandma and Granddad) immediately stepped up to the plate and played the role of adopted Grandparents taking our two girls into their hearts. They loved our girls like their own causing much confusion amongst their friends as to how a Jewish family could have non-Jewish Grandparents. Buby and Zaidy spent most Christmases with us helping us celebrate the birth of Christ and just wanting to be a part of our family – true and dear friends.

In recent years Zaidy has been struggling with cancer and although he has been fighting it with amazing bravery and spirit it has now taken over his entire body progressing to brain cancer.

Is he sad and miserable? Absolutely not! He is laughing and joking and smiling almost continuously, or as much as he can. “Where’s the Hook?” he asks from his hospital bed (he always refers to me as “the Hook”) and smiles when we visit him.

Throughout the years that we have known and loved Buby and Zaidy they have always had a good outlook on life. Always laughing, smiling, never complaining, moaned or criticized any aspect of their lives. Even during times of pain has he complained? No. He might have winced but not complained.

As a Christian family we value our Jewish friends for what we have learned from them and reflect fondly on the many lighthearted conversations we have had about religion and my teasing him about his passion for that Canadian game that I am beginning to appreciate – Hockey! His adopted Grandchildren have visited him hospital and are very happy for him, which might appear to be strange, but they both say that he’s had a happy life and should be even happier that he is going to heaven to be with God.

I am oh so grateful that Zaidy came into our families lives. We value very much what we have learned just by watching him living his life which has been an amazing example of loving, caring, and compassion.

True friendships outside of marriage are very valuable and extremely important when it comes to the life that we wish to lead. So often we surround ourselves with people or crowds that appear to be exciting, and daring because we are so desperate to “fit in”. And the reason we want to fit in is because we don’t know where we are going in life. Many times we just feel lost and lonely and being in the wrong crowd can’t help us.

Surround yourself with mentors, people who see you for what and who you are and not for what you might become. Surround yourself with non-judgemental and non-opinionated people who are secure and happy with their own life’s direction whom you can admire and respect for who they are. Learn and gain from their strengths and not from the weaknesses of those around you. Zaidy was all these things to our family.

During these precious days I want to say thankyou Zaidy. For being a friend to my wife and I, for being a Grandfather to our children, and for teaching me, through your example how to be a true ambassador of life.

God Bless You

WHY NOW AND NOT THEN

This strange title for a blog came to my mind as I was trimming the trees in my backyard and dragging the efforts of my labors down to the fire pit for burning at a later stage.

Whilst I was tearing away at the foliage my wife was on hands and knees diligently weeding out all the stinging nettles that are sprouting up all over our lawn making it not all attractive to look at. The trouble being that as I mow the lawn it spreads the seeds of these nettles encouraging them to spread even further. Not a pretty site.

Our house is beautiful and is my semi-retirement home sitting on the lake in Port Perry, Canada. It is my dream home and with all the work that we have done is stunning, to say the least. My wife is a genius when it comes to construction work, she can do it all, and gets it done right first time. Me? I put a shelf up, open a window and guaranteed the draft will blow it down. So I make the beds and do the cooking (some of it).

So here we are today, out in the heat, working on our garden doing something that we should have done months, if not years ago. We have a lot to do, it’s going to take a lot of hard work and graft to get it looking right. It’s not just a few hours work, it’s going to be days if not a couple of weeks. Blisters, dirty finger nails. Muddy sweat running down our cheeks, and aching bones at the end of the day.

So why are we putting ourselves through all this pain? Why now. Because we want to sell our home, well not want to but have to due to my wife’s work. (That’s another story). So why now and not “then”,” then” being earlier than now. “Then” being weeks before, or months before, or better still when it NEEDED to be done. Yes we would of course sit out on the deck watching the sunsets and see the weeds growing, We knew that they needed dealing with, but we could always get round to it later. As I cut the lawn I knew that I was cutting the heads off the weeds which in a way hid the weeds and took them out of my minds eye – I could deal with them later. But there was always something else that got in the way of our dealing with the weeds.

There were Bar-B-Q’s, parties, meetings, TV shows, excuses and even more excuses – all of them good reasons for not dealing with the weeds. Had we dealt with the problem “then” it would have taken only minutes each day, but now it’s taking hours each day.

So why NOW and not THEN. We have new motivation, we want to sell our home and have to everything possible to encourage someone to want to buy our home, make a decision.

This dilemma of now and then faces us in all our lives, putting off until tomorrow what can be done today. We very often delay business decisions because we are too busy and then we suffer later due to inactivity – filing of taxes, hiring/firing staff/servicing/staff training/purchasing/marketing. We also very often delay making decisions that affect our family lives – addressing internal conflicts/keeping in touch with distant love ones/taking time to listen to and hearing our children.

We are all continually being bombarded with daily decisions and if we were to deal with them, face them as they arose then life would be oh so much better. I was always taught to start the day with the most difficult and arduous task and finish the day with the easiest and simplest, that way the day finishes on a high note.

So guess what. From now on my garden will be weeded on a daily basis. D.I.N is my new motto – DO IT NOW why not make it yours as well.

To book David for your next conference or meeting contact him directly info@davidhooker.net

THE KING IS DEAD

Like most of us I expect that you are into at least one type of music be it jazz, classical, pop or whatever. If so I am trusting that you might at least have heard of that great blues master BB King who sadly died recently. His impact on the blues scene was immense with a following that took him and his music around the world affecting all genres of music leaving a legacy that in many ways has affected all musicians everywhere.

As we look back over time we can all identify individuals who have made an impact on our lives, who have affected history and changed the way in which we either live or view life. In some cases it could be the person we married, or the child that we now nurture, or just someone who crossed paths with us at some time or other whose opinion or thought process made us stop and rethink our opinions, our lifes direction, or caused us to slow down and take stock – which is always a good thing to do.

The most well-known of all people that impacted our lives was of course Jesus Christ, and no matter what your beliefs are there is no doubt that this one person impacted us more than anyone else.

Many radio stations took time out to discuss the passing of BB King and his impact, playing his music and telling his story.

There was one interview of BB that made an instant impression on me making me reflect on the man. At a performance BB was being asked questions by his young audience and one budding guitarist asked him what type of strings he used. This questioner was keen to find out the answer as he believed that with the correct strings he could produce the same sound as BB.

BB's answer was profound. "It's not the strings that matter, it's what's in your fingers that matters. Your fingers make the music, what you feel in your heart as you touch those strings is what makes the music".

That answer was quite disappointing to that young guitarist for he was looking for 'the secret', and what he learned was that there is no such thing as secret to success, to achievement.

What is in your heart, in your soul, your deepest desire is what drives you on to success and happiness and ultimate achievements. Don't seek outside for satisfaction, look inside yourself for that is where you will find your true self, your true desires and find true satisfaction.

Don’t ask others what their secret for success is, they really don’t know. Follow what is in your heart and perform your task to the best of your ability, doing your best is what attracts attention and others to your mission and vision.

BB King did not set out to have an impact, he just wanted to perform and pour as much love as possible into his task.

Do what you love and love what you do. It worked for BB King, why not for you.

ARE YOU TRULY COMMITTED

As I sit and write this blog Canada is preparing for the hosting of the Pan Am games, the coming together of athletes from around the world all with one goal in mind - to do the best that they can. Of course they all want to win, but just the fact that they qualified to participate will be enough for many of them.

Interesting isn't it - years of practise, day after day, hour after hour, stretching their bodies further than they have ever been stretched before. Approaching one pain barrier in preparation for the next. Focusing their minds on what lies ahead, ignoring all negative influences that surround them and just focusing on one thing . . .participating in the games – which equals SUCCESS.

What are you focusing on, I mean TRULY focusing on. Are you focusing on a goal/project so much that you are prepared to give up anything to achieve your goal?

Remember the story about Christ who died for what he believed in?

I am not expecting you to die for your belief but I am expecting you to make a strong commitment to what you believe in. A commitment so strong that regardless of those around you, the stumbling blocks that will inevitably be placed before you, the mental pain barriers that will have to be dealt with, you will get up and overcome the challenges and trials that you will inevitably face. Are you prepared and ready to face the challenges?

"Most people never run far enough on their first wind to find out they've got a second. Give your dreams all you've got and you'll be amazed at the energy that comes out of you."

William James 1842-1910, Psychologist, Professor and Author

To boom David for your next seminar, conference, or training program please email him - info@davidhooker.net

IT'S A CAT AND MOUSE GAME

Life is all about going after what we need first and then what we want second. Need has to comes first and then comes want. Sometimes unfortunately we tend to forget what we need and only focus on what we want. And sadly, when we actually get what we want we soon get fed up with it, it loses its glitter and then we want more.

Many people want the latest cell phone, must have 3D television, must be the first to get the Apple watch, and must have the newest iPad. Although we are not all financially secure we are living in a throw-away society, whether we can afford it or not. In days gone by we threw things out because they no longer worked, today we throw things out because there is something new on the market that shouts out BY ME!

Sadly many of us are living our lives just like that. We throw away relationships because temporarily it is not working or we just want a change. We throw away our marriages because we have forgotten how to love each other and have stopped working at it. We throw away the love of and for our children because we fail to understand THEIR needs and focus only on our own. We throw away our health because we have forgotten how to value our bodies and have no idea how they work, or perhaps we just don’t care./p>

We have also forgotten the need to love our neighbors. Imagine the world if we all loved and cared for each other.

I was always taught that you can’t have what you want until you want what you have. Quite profound eh! If we spent more time appreciating exactly what we have, being thankful for the important things in our lives and enjoying what we have instead of hankering after what we don’t have life would be so much different. Imagine a life of contentment.

They say that life is a game of cat and mouse, chasing after what we want and being chased by those trying to give us what we don’t need.

In a cat and mouse chase the mouse mostly wins. Why? Because the cat runs for the food she wants. The mouse wins because she is running for the life that she needs. The fear of loss is always a better motivation than the desire of gain.

Look after what you have because by chasing after what you don’t need you could lose everything.

PROTECT YOUR FLOWERS AND DESTROY THE WEEDS

It doesnt matter whether or not you're a gardner or not so I am going to assume that you can tell the difference between weeds and flowers - beautiful and ugh, positive and negative.

If you leave a garden untended it very quickly gets overgrown with ugly/negative weeds. It is those weeds that strangle the beautiful flowers and cover the ground so thickly that the beautiful flowers have absolutely no chance whatsoever of growing or surviving. Its interesting to note that weeds don't need planting, they just grow. Flowers however need attention, they need love and need protecting from the weeds.

We are surrounded on a daily basis by both positive (the flowers) and negative (the weeds) influences that can affect us in a myriad of ways. Negative influences are so damaging and just like the garden need weeding out on a daily basis and if neglected will smother and destroy your attitude, your project, your business, your life.

To avoid the damage that can be caused you need to be continually working on your attitude to block out the weeds/negativity. How? Mix with positive people. Dont listen to negativity - walk away. Believe in yourself and your decisions. Dont be impatient - it takes time to build a beautiful garden/business. Nurture your business with love.

We were all created from a seed. A seed of love. That seed was nurtured in the mothers body and cared for by the beauty of Mother Nature. Each seed is already pre-programmed to be whatever it was meant to be. You were pre-programmed to be successful and NOT to be a failure. You were not designed to fail. Once out of the womb it is for you to look after yourself, to feed/nourish/water yourself. It is for you to keep the seeds of negativity (the weeds) away from your life and your future. Keep the weeds away and believe, have faith, and trust in your destiny.

Spend more time in your garden and not in the garden of others.

I'VE BEEN AWAY

Yep, that's true, I have been away reviewing my life, my activity, my past, and my future. And no matter what you say that is a tremendous amount of reflection. Of course I have been working throughout the past years but I have been questioning the direction that my life has been taking me.

For those of you that don't know me that well I have been a public speaker on the international stage for 4 decades travelling to and working in 37 countries with audiences from a few hundred to many thousands. I have been blessed with a fabulous life and loved every minute of it.

But recently I started questioning myself as to what are my true motives. Have I been working for the benefit of me, or for the benefit of others. Perhaps that is a question that we should all be asking ourselves - why are we doing what we are doing?

I spent an amazing year living and working in India which is where my transformation started - I urge you all to do the same, it would change your lives forever (it did mine). I learned that money is not the be all and end all of life, living life is. It was this outlook of life that started my reflection.

Instead of me focusing my speaking presentations on how to make more money my focus is now on how to make more out of your lives.

During the past couple of years I have spent a lot of time with myself, finding myself, looking inwards and assessing how best to use my God given talents in a way that helps others develop their own talents to also help others.

My Christian upbringing has always frustrated me for although I have always believed that there was more to life I could never come to accept that there was a God or some super being that controlled everything. That was beyond my comprehension.

During my questioning and doubting many doors have opened before me offering opportunities for learning about myself, learning about others, and gradually accepting that there is something out there. It doesn't matter what it is or who it is, or what we call him or how we describe our God, because we all need something to believe in and or someone to talk to in private moments. It was during my private moments that my new life's direction was decided upon.

I have now learned that by living what we believe, and not just talking about what we believe is the key to monumental success in all that we do.

Join me on my exciting journey of discovery.